Gifts of Love

Every parent wants and hopes hard that his/her child brings home report cards with flying colors. Yet, some parents may see their hopes shatter. Frustrated parents are quick to fly into bad temper. They see no reasons why their children cannot do as well as other children.

Every child is a natural achiever. Children learn fast and absorb new knowledge hungrily. Unless there are problems, every child usually excels in academic and sports.

You don’t have to be quick to give up hopes on your child. There are many reasons behind a child’s ‘underachieving’.  You must find out fast before the reasons become disease. Some of the pointers are: 

1.     Your child does not seem to be interested in doing his homework.

He/She complains that the teacher does not explain the topic clearly. Your child may shove the responsibility away to someone else easily. Find out from the teachers if your child has not been paying attention in class. Look into the distractions yourself.

2.     Your child may have eyesight problem.

Some children have severe eyesight problem when they are young. Get an appointment with the optometrist as soon as possible. Get to the root of the problem. Follow the advice of the professional. Children like to complain, but they rarely tell their parents about their conditions. 

3.     Your child does not sleep well at night.

This can cause him/her to be sleepy during lessons. Avoid watching television programs on weekdays' night. You can put up a schedule to help your child to choose the programs to watch. Avoid heavy supper before bedtime as your child would find it difficult to sleep with a full stomach.

4.     Your child does not have breakfast before going to school.

This makes the child sleepy and less attentive in class. Some children just dislike breakfast. However, make it a habit to have breakfast together with your child. A filled stomach helps a child to be attentive during lessons.

5.     Lack of exercise can cause a child to be tired easily.

The child will not be paying attention during lessons. Obesity sets in when a child eats too much and not moving around much at all. At certain times, this child may even feign illness so that he/she does not have to go to school.

6.     Your child does not have time to do homework and revision due to the tight schedule you have arranged everyday.

You have your child attend two or three different tuition classes every day. Your child will be tired by the time he/she reaches home. Some children like to take their own sweet time to do their work. So, there would not be enough time to finish his/her school homework. Your child will not enlighten you with this problem. You have to find out the hard way.

7.     Your child is dependent on you or the private home tutor.

The child finds it difficult to complete his school homework without guidance. You have to be firm sometimes to make your child to do things alone. You must not offer too much help until the learning process becomes a spoon-feeding process.

8.     Your child is under some kind of stress.

As parents, you have a right to be critical of your child's progress in school. Remember that, although your child wants to please you, the stress you have inevitably put on your child can make him/her terrify of school and studies. If you need to have a professional opinion, please do so discreetly. Your child does not need the extra and unwanted attention from others.

9.     You have stayed away from your child's emotional need.

Your good intention of allowing your child the complete freedom of doing and learning things may not be proper at this time. Your child is not 'learning ready' yet. As your child has been spoon-fed all the while, it is difficult for him/her to be independent all of a sudden. 

10.         Your child has befriended those who care least about school.

Although you cannot be with your child all the time, you should be on the alert who your child’s friends are. Invite them home for a gathering to know them. Be observant and give gentle and useful advice to your child. Do not disgrace his/her friends openly. Encourage your child and his/her friends to do homework together in your own home. This way you can make sure they are all learning something.

11.      Do not emphasis only on the grades.

Parents are always afraid that their children will obtain poor grades in school. They emphasis too much in the grades their children will obtain in each and every test and examination.  Children with such weight on their shoulders will carry the fear of failure in them too. They will either try hard or do not want to try at all. 

12.      Unhappy experience at home.

Quarreling parents can easily distract children from their studies. Children do have the fear that something bad will happen at home. Unless parents know how to handle the situation, the children will suffer.

13.    Time to adjust to new surrounding.

Children always find it difficult to adjust to new surrounding in a short time. If you have just moved to another area, give your children some time to familiarize with the place and people. Sensitive children will need a longer period. They will need to go through the process of readjusting their emotions towards the new people they meet and the place they live. 

14.                 Be clear that your child has a problem.

Sometimes children just want some attention from their parents. How else to get it but by obtaining low grades in school? They are playing with your emotion. Spend more time with your child. Do things together. Let your child feels your love and presence.

Whatever the reasons maybe, you need to solve the problem as soon as possible. Do not blame others for your child's problems. Certain problems can be solved easily if you put in some effort and attention. Always discuss with your child before making a decision. Do not assume anything just because someone else you trust says so

The greatest gift from parents to

their children;

TRUST 

Every child is special.

Every special child is unique! 

Have you seen children playing home? Two will be the parents; the others play the roles of children. They will always play the scene of a meal time. Mother and children are cooking while the father is reading something. Children picture ‘family’ as only during a meal time.

Do not let this to happen. Children like to copy what the people around them do. As they spend most of their time at home, they will observe and copy what their parents do. They will reproduce what they hear and see in games they play among themselves.

Since you want your children to be interested in learning, you have to create ways to actively include learning in your profession and everyday life. Do not stop learning.

When your children see you actively learning something new, they will want to learn with you. This will be a great chance to lead by example.

As you include learning in your profession, you dramatically increase your career advancement opportunities. This will increase your professional fulfillment that will in a way benefit your children and you yourself.

Your children will be able to see that learning continuously is reaping in great returns. You get to spend more time with them as well as advancing into your profession. That is something your children will be proud of all the time.

Even those small common items in everyday life can be great subject to learn together. Get yourself connected to the internet or buy a set of encyclopedia. Look up for their information together. You will be surprised how much you will gain from the information.

Write your notes on papers. You will get your children to write with you eagerly too. At a younger age, they may think holding a pencil and sketching on it is fun. However, as they grow older, writing will be one of the ways they express themselves.

Get your children to keep a diary. Encourage them by doing so yourself. There are many things you can do together with your children that promote learning.

Soon, you will be able to see the result. Your children will be interested in learning themselves without your prompts.

If you care to spend just an hour a day with your children now,

You don't have to worry that they will forget you when they grow up.