Gifts of Love

Parents have the same fear as they watch their children growing up. When their children show disinterest in learning or education, they are very disturbed.

Research tells us that children take time to develop their knowledge, attitude and skills. Let us explore why children are afraid of learning. One of the reasons is; children always feel they are learning everything on their own. They feel lonely in the process of learning. They feel they do not have the freedom to do things they like.

Maybe it is time you as a parent do something to help your children.

        Here are some tips to help you to get your children to develop a healthy respect for learning.

-         Surround your children with people who love learning. Encourage them to join some creative classes in your neighborhood. You may also go shopping around for a good tuition centre where the learners really achieve in what they are taught.

-         Invite some friends who are skilled in diverse fields to give a talk. Ask your children to invite their friends too. After that, have a practical session where the children will learn hands-on a new skill.

-         Ask your children to invite their friends over to read some books together. Not every child likes this. However, when your children posses some good books, the invite is hard to resist.

-         Be creative whenever you assign tasks to your children. Let them come up with the solutions themselves. If your children give up too soon, encourage them to go on. The process of learning includes exploring together. Do not let your children give up midway.

-         Do not lecture or reprimand your children repeatedly for a job they did not do well. Just remind them your expectation. Repeated lectures will discourage their learning spirits.

-         Do not remind your children of the sacrifices you have made for them. They will know in time. Telling them this will make your children feel that they are learning for your sake instead of theirs.

-         Stop complaining about your work especially in front of your children. They will lose the respect for learning because you have imbedded in their minds that the dead end of learning is work.

-         Give your children the freedom to gather information. If you think they are still young, then be there to guide them. Learn with them. You are also helping yourself at the same time.

-         Encourage your children to have a hobby. Parents have the wrong perception that hobbies are a waste of time. The truth is every learning process starts with a hobby. 

Unlike adults, children need more time to absorb what they have learnt. You need to be patient. Instill in them a respect for learning at a young age and you will have little worry as they grow up.     

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 Every child learns in his/her own special way. There is such a thing known as ‘learning readiness’ in every child and adult. Some children learn readily because they are taught so early in life. Some children refuse to learn because they are not ready to do so. Others do not have the opportunity at all.  

As a parent, you want to be your children’s best friend. You see your children as your reflections. You see hope and future in them. You want to invest in these hopes. There are many successful business people and famous politicians as well as great leaders. Yet, there are not many successful parents.

Do you know that parents are actually their children’s best role models? Yes, a child does not have to look far for someone to be his/her idol. You, as a parent can be your children’s idol.

How can that be done? Some of the ways are listed here.

•   Stop complaining in front of your children. Too much complains spoil the atmosphere. Your children may even feel angry because there is no more ‘fun’ when you and your spouse are at home. The resentment will build up.
• Pay attention your image when you are with your children. Leave your work problems in the office. Be a parent at home. Enjoy the moment with your children. You do not get the chance any more once they reach their teenage years!

• Show your enthusiastic toward their learning and education. When possible, learn with them. Do not lecture your children when they are not doing well academically. Every child has his/her own ‘learning readiness’ or in another word, ‘learning curve’. 
• It will take some time for a child to be able to absorb what is taught. Be patient. If your child does not understand a concept, explain to him/her again. Do not show your frustration openly.

• Take the time to find out what your children like. Children love doing things with their parents. Do you know all children love to be seen with their parents? That will be their fondest memory.

• Let your children help with the housework even though you have a maid. Making your children do some household chores make them feel they belong to the family. This helps to bring out some realization that their parents have great responsibilities. They will feel right to share the burden.

• Share your problems with your children. Ask them for their opinions. Do not share your work problem, of course. Just share some daily problems like, who is going to care for their youngest brother when you and your spouse are away for a meeting. You will be surprise with the outcome!

• Be empathy to your children’s problems. They may face problems in school or have problems with friends. Do not pass on your judgment. Children just want a listener not a problem solver. Do not interfere with your children and their friends’ arguments. They know how to get things settled without your intervention.

Your children know how much you love them. They will be happier when you do things with them rather than for them. As a role model, do all that you can and show your enthusiastic in helping them to find out more about themselves!

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